Today was a very quiet day. Lots of recovery and inside time.
Aeryn is in love with this new easel from her grandparents for her birthday. It’s chalk one side and a magnetic whiteboard on the other. She’s especially fond of scribbling and rubbing it all out again!
My baby girl turned 2 today. As you can see in the picture, she’s still really poorly but was trying her best to stay upbeat. She really loved this little wooden robot we got her to match her yellow and orange robots.
We cancelled our planned first trip to a zoo and stayed at home and at my in laws house instead, doing indoors, mundane stuff. She couldn’t manage much else.
I do want to take the time to think about how wonderful this little person in my life is. She speaks pretty much fluently, sings her little heart out spontaneously whenever she feels.like it, give the best cuddles, loves her family fiercely and definitely knows her own mind. She is polite and shows so much empathy, I’m constantly amazed. Considering she was induced, premature and has an allergy, she couldn’t be doing any better in so many ways.
I’m so grateful for the privilege of raising her. I can’t imagine my world without her in it, now. Happy birthday, Aeryn Hazel. I love you more than I can ever say, but I’ll still say it as much as I can.
I took almost no photos today as poor Aeryn is really suffering with conjunctivitis and flu symptoms. But here is a dairy free, vegan sticky toffee pudding I made to cheer everyone up.
Sadly, Aeryn couldn’t manage even a bite. I think baby boy liked it though, he was kicking like crazy after! Probably a bit of a sugar rush!
Today, we started Aeryn’s birthday weekend with my side of the family. Unfortunately, she seems to have caught conjunctivitis and is feeling very sorry for herself! This magnetic fishing game gift from Charlotte and Nick really cheered her up, though.
Here’s hoping for at least a little sleep tonight after she was so unsettled last night. She’s poorly and missing her daddy lots. It’s hard being ill when you’re little.
We headed to Bristol today to see my parents and sisters for Aeryn’s birthday. Ben didn’t come with us, he’s working Saturday and Sunday this week, but he helped with our suitcases. Aeryn dragged hers the whole 5 minute walk to the car by herself! She was very determined.
Aeryn had a great time trying play dough today! I love the look of concentration here.
One of Aeryn’s favourite spots to sit is on the edge of this armchair by the window. She likes to keep her drink and snacks on the window sill.
Today, she felt her brother kick! We were lying in bed for a bedtime story and I could feel him kicking, so absent-mindedly touched my stomach. For the first time, I could feel it from the outside too! I placed her hand on my tummy and she felt it! She was really captivated. And a bit cross I wouldn’t let her kick him back! We stroked and kissed him to say hello instead, once I explained!
Today, I am 20 weeks pregnant! Halfway to our estimated due date, or 16 weeks away if little bean arrives at the same time his sister did!
Which brings me to point number two: our baby is a boy!! He looks happy and healthy and was wiggling like crazy, but I can barely feel him moving because I have an anterior placenta, so it cushions his kicks in some positions.
I can’t begin to express the relief I feel knowing he is okay. We’ve had such an awful start to the year in so many ways, I was beginning to expect bad news.
Ever since our first baby miscarried, every appointment and scan (of which I had many with Aeryn and a few so far with little bean), there is that ever present, heart in mouth feeling that baby might not make it here after all.
Seeing Aeryn run and play and feeling her brother kick and watching him wiggle on the screen, I know that they both so easily could have never existed at all. By some quirk of biology, some misplaced cells, they might have never been conceived. By some bizarre, unfair, random event, they might never grow to term and take their first tiny breaths. Intangible and lost.
I’m not religious at all, I’m an atheist. But I certainly felt like thanking someone that everything looked okay today. It’s suddenly feeling very real and very soon.
“Hey Jen, did you remember a photo for your blog? No? Best take one of me, then!”
Every fortnight, we do tabletop role playing. I’ve played Dungeons and Dragons for years, since I was about 7, but this game is Mutants and Masterminds, a superhero themed game. We use these hero clix of actual super heroes as a representation of our characters for combat, but we’re playing fictional supers.
Ben and I met and bonded over our love of games. We can’t wait until Aeryn is old enough to play!